me, scheming for brownie points one baked good at a time

Ingredients

• 1 cup heavy cream
• 5 TB unsalted butter
• 2 TB bourbon – but honestly can probably use way more because only using half of the smol shot bottle is sad
• ??? salt however much idk
• 1/2 dark maple syrup (bc canadian)
• 1 1/4 cup white sugar
• salt (for the top)

STEPS:

1. line 8inch baking dish with parchment paper… but actually get 8inch dish because trying to make a bigger dish smaller by sectioning it off with a ziplock bag box doesnt result in the most even spreading
2. combine cream, butter, bourbon (but can probably use any dark alcohol or extra spicy in this step… fireball anyone?) in saucepan over medium-high. once it boils remove from heat
3. combine maple syrup and sugar in saucepan (make sure its decently tall to prevent any splashing/sugar induced burns) and heat to 280 using new fun candy thermometer that for some reason has hard and soft crack lines? (undetermined use)
4. when it reaches 280 (keep close eye on it and don’t take off heat) pour heavy cream mixture into it
5. RESIST URGE TO STIR MIXTURE BC APPARENTLY THAT CRYSTALLIZES THE SUGAR AND MAKES IT GRAINY
6. continue to mix until it reaches 250. will probably take longer than anticipated … but don’t increase stove temp too much because don’t need to accidentally burn sugar out here
7. pour caramel into pan, top with flakey salt, and let cool at room temp for 30 minutes or so. then put into fridge to set for 2ish hours or until the next morning after going out to a fun bar for birthday and subsequent chenard chenanigans (ie. not stealing unicorn busts from unsuspecting establishments).
8. put caramel on parchment lined countertop and cut with knife or honestly maybe use a pizza cutter bc i think that would do the trick way easier if its actually sharp.
9. painstakingly wrap individual caramels in parchment paper and wait for best girlfriend award.